Nothing like a career in staffing to make you really wonder about your fellow humans. We all have amazing stories to tell and here is a selection of intriguing résumé excerpts, gleaned from a number of sources. These are all allegedly true:

• Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chain store.
• Personal interests: Donating blood. 15 gallons so far.
• References: None, I’ve left a path of destruction behind me.
• I am loyal to my employer at all costs . . . . Please respond to my resume on my office voice mail.
• Extensive background in accounting. I can also stand on my head.
• Proven ability to track down and correct erors.
• Finished 8th in my high school graduating class of 10.
• Note: Please don’t misconstrue my 14 jobs as job-hopping. I have never quit a job.
• Reason for leaving: They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 every morning. Couldn’t work under those conditions.
• Please call me after 5:30 because I am self-employed and my employer does not know that I am looking for another job.